I'm not about to give up, ever.

You told me this:

Love is not about being with the person physically all the time.
Love is when you keep the person in your heart. And take comfort in the fact that no matter what you do, there'll always be someone who will always love you and forgive you.
Love is when you know what the other person is going to say even before they say it.
Love is what brings you the greatest pains in life. And it is also the greatest joy.

Thank you. I understand it now.
I truly understand.

you're my greatest gift in life. I never meant to give us up. It'll never happen, trust me.
We'll go on. I love you so much it hurts. Yet the times i spent with you were the happiest. There's a comforting knowledge that you'll always be there for me, and you'll never leave me. i no longer doubt it. The thought soothes me, takes me away from the hell i'm living in, gives me hope. You give me love that no one has given me, not even my family. so i grew to become dependent on you, held on to you for dear life. For letting you go means that i will plunge into darkness, and i will become aimless in life again. I'm sorry i became over-reliant on you, i never meant to make you feel this way. I never was ready to stand on my own feet, all i got from my family was scoldings, screamings, shoutings, it is horrible. I never learnt. But now it is time for me to start from scratch, learn step-by-step to be independent. Now i actually have a goal to work towards, with you. I have to keep that in mind. No matter what happens, i will be here for you. I will learn to be a better person.


ps) i will start by getting a job. any job offers, anyone??