yesterdy was the most horrible day of my life..

i vomited 12 times in total at home and at the polyclinic. i really fely like i was gonna die.. imagine puking every 20-30 minutes. i didn't even have energy to walk or talk. i had to be pushed around in a wheelchair at the polyclinic's. i wanna say thanks to my mom. despite having stomach ache herself, she wheeled me around, up and down, the polyclinic. the thing was, the doctor's at the 2nd level, and the nurses are at the 1st level. i went up and down 3 times in total, first at the nurses', then saw the doctor, had my jab at the nurses', went back to the doctor, then went to rest at the nurses' cos i really had no energy to go home, then got reviewed by the doctor again to see if there was a need to send me to A&E. i was puking all the time.

all these, she did without any complaints. thanks mom. i still remember holing on to her hand when i had my jab, felt her pats and rubbings on my back when i puked, and her anxious questions on whether i was going to puke again.

when we got home, she got me a cup of glucose water. and i went to sleep. for a long time... then i had enough energy to eat something and i ate the porridge she cooked for me. it never tasted any better. i went back to sleep again. by that time, i've already stopped vomiting, and it was a good thing, otherwise it's A&E i go.

it's all a plan. it's all God's plan. to show me how blinded i've been to my mom's love. i still remember a few days ago, i was very fed up with her being so unreasonable and childish. i said that she didn't love me, and i said she destroyed my home by screaming and shouting everday. the two days i was sick, she didn't raise her voice at all. for once, i felt her love for me. from the time she came to my rescue when i was moaning in the toilet, (trying to vomit yet couldn't) patted my back while i was vomiting, wheeled me all around in the polyclinic, offered me her hand while i was getting the jab, cooked delicious porridge for me, even prepared porridge for me to bring to school today. for all that, i brought myself to say "thank you" to her this afternoon on my way to school. she turned and waved. i waved back. it was a moment which i couldn't put the feelings in words. thank you, mom. i wish you'd see this post. i'm sorry for all my rudeness and stubborness, i must have hurt you a lot by saying those things i said. i'm such an unfilial daughter. i'm truly sorry. i'll never be so mean to you anymore. i love you, mom.

i came to school for math and bio, but mainly math. i was greeted by momo at the bus stop, and he helped me carry my bag to school. then we went to look for jaclyn and jolene. thanks people, for all your concern yesterday! :) for once, i felt that so many people loved me, and were concerned about me. i heard shannon, xavier, ash, yipz went to sit with momo and asked him what happened to us. thanks guys! you're one bunch of people we can count on to be there for us.

oh, i forgot to tell everyone what i came down with. i had a bout of severe food poisoning. people!! don't ever go to the Han's outlet near nee soon east camp. my mom and i ate sirloin steak there and came down with food poisoning. don't ever go there. the service was extremely poor, (what service! we had to take the food to our tables ourselves) and the food tasted horrible. an extreme waste of time and money. plus the money used to see doctor. i'm never going to eat steak again, unless it's at a very established restaurant. argh. i hate han's. for all the pain you've brought me. but i need to thank you too, for letting me feel the love i've been surrounded with all these while and i didn't realise it. stupid me. haha.

but now i know. how foolish i've been. how ignorant and blinded i've been to all the love around me, especially to my mom's love for me.

thank you mom, dad, sis, momo, and friends. i love you guys. there is so much you've done for me, and there is just too much to list them down here. but i just wanna let each and every one of you know that every little thing you do, i am grateful for them. i don't ever want to lose them.

i love you mom
i love you dad
i love you sis
i love you momo
i love you, my beloved friends.
thank you for letting me feel loved.